Death called my cell today I said it's a wrong number the voice replied they're all wrong numbers but anyway this is just a courtesy call meant to vex your thoughts for no good reason or rhyme how do I know you're even real I asked but the voice was quick and impatient now just try to hang me up it jarringly said you'll know I'm still here it's a party line after all remember those when you were never alone then I'll mark your call as spam I said feigning courage in the moment I'll report you then block callbacks it's a solid plan said death musing over the possibilities but you're still doomed from the start forgetting that I'm the agency of Last Reports.